Those funny break-up lines!

My friend has the funniest break up stories and proposed to write the below post about it!

Post by Sarah Awad:

Dating in Lebanon is pretty much the same as dating anywhere else.
You think you’ve found the one every time you meet someone but he’s not the one, he’s just another ONE.
The honeymoon phase is so intense that you deeply believe this will never ever end until the “mmm..this isn’t working out”, and you’ll only get that phrase after your partner has disappeared for a few days (he/she thought the silent break up might go unnoticed).
At the confrontation moment which we all lived at some point in our lives, creativity starts pouring, and breakups excuses get better as the arguing go on. I’ve said some mean things myself and I’ve heard some and I’ve witness some funny ones.

Here it goes:

“I’m in the middle of my career”

 “I’m taking a course”

“I’m living in a bad environment, i have needs..”

 “i don’t believe in god but i can’t convert for u”

 “i want to travel the world, alone…”


“but it’s Vegas” 

“you live too far, el benzene 3am yeghla”

“you’ve gotten fat”

 “i don’t know how to deal with the situation”

“I’m not ready for commitment”

“I’m not stable”

 “my salary is too low”

 “i can’t kiss u anymore, there is no physical attraction”

“maybe we can just be friends”

“his cheeks are more pink than yours”

“You’re too young for me. I mean, too *old*. We’re the same age? Well, that doesn’t work for me, either”

 “you’re a psycho”

“my parents don’t let me date”

“I’m allergic to u”

 “You talked about the future, and that freaked me out. It makes me sick to think about it.”

“our bloods don’t match”

“u don’t have enough money”

“ u don’t like animals”

 “I’m getting back with my ex”

“we don’t have the same political view”

“my parents won’t let me marry a Shiit”

 “I can’t be with someone who doesn’t like Hariri/Nasralla/etc”

“I can’t be with someone who doesn’t believe in the holy Qoran/bible”

“Too bad ur muslim”

“I’m sorry size matters”

 “you’re too hairy”

“I don’t know how to love”

“I don’t know why, I can’t love you”

“I’m a free spirited person, I can’t commit”

“Your voice is ugly and pitchy especially when you sing” 

“You’re not a virgin”

“I don’t believe in monogamy”

“It’s me not you”

 “It’s you, not me…I mean it’s me, not you”

“It’s not you…it’s me…well is you”

If any of you told or were told a funny break up catch please share it with us.
As much as it hurts, let’s make breaking up not a dramatic situation anymore but a funny story we can share!


15 thoughts on “Those funny break-up lines!

  1. hahahaha yeah i have a love life, most are stories my friends shared with me. Yala share ur break up story if u ever had one 🙂

  2. hahahaha that is so funny!
    Once a girl broke up with me because when I used to shower at her place I used to drop water outside the bath tub hehehe i am dead serious! another one left me because I did not party as much as she wanted 🙂
    but once i broke up with someone because she had no taste in clothes hehe

  3. Me, calling the girl after a few dates: “so, wanna go grab a coffee tonight?”

    Her: “Sorry I can’t, I’m gona be busy all night doing my recycling”…

    My best one ever, being stood up by recycling!!! It’s so good, I’m actually waiting for the moment to use it myself haha!

  4. hahaha that is very funny! once a girl broke up with me because I drop water outside the bathtub when i shower at her place:D haha baddeh sallim 3layha min 3ala haza el minbar mwah!

  5. I LOVE IT SOUSSSSSSSS! Love that i know who said what:P
    Wana hear more lines :
    – “Uhmm sorry, we can’t be together, i still need time to save money”, & a month later, he’s married 😛
    – “It’s too serious, too soon, but i adore you”.
    – “She dresses very short, it pisses me off”.
    – “I can’t be with u, u don’t have the same political views as my dad, it’s not gona work”.
    – “Need to get back to my ex, i feel guilty leaving her”.
    – ……

    ENJOY 😀

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